Patience

I've discovered recently, that contrary to my belief, I do not have a lot of patience.  

I desperately need to find some before I fall off my rocker.

As a 16 year old, I fervently prayed for patience.  

That sentence needs to come with the following disclaimer: *Do NOT try this at home*

Have you ever heard the saying "Be careful what you ask for" - yeah, whoever said that wasn't kidding.

Anyway, enough of my sulking.  But, seriously, I need to learn some patience.

I need to learn to be patient when people ask me a lot of questions.  I need to learn that maybe they just want to get to know me better.  Or, maybe they don't have anything to say, so they tend to ask questions.  Or, maybe all they know how to do is ask questions.  

No matter what, I need to learn to be patient with them and to answer their questions with a smile.  And, I should try to not be a smart-alek with my answers.  But, that can come later.  

baby. steps. 

I also need to learn that there is a time for everything.  I grew up with Ecclesiastes 3 being read on a daily basis.  You'd think I already had this one down pat.  Yeah, not so much.

I tend to try and make everything happen - to cram 15,465,568,987 things into one simple 24 hour day.  

Why I do this, I will never know.  

I don't want to become a different person, I just want to learn to trust in God for everything.  I'm great at trusting Him with big things like death, marriage, kids, jobs, etc.  I'm not as good with trusting Him with my daily schedule.  I need to learn to trust that He wants me to have a great life, to do fun things, to be happy.  But, His method of me getting there might be different than the method that I have in my head.  I need to learn to be patient and to wait on His method.  It is the right method, so it is worth waiting for...

So, tonight I am going to start.  

I am going to try and answer asked questions in a calm and happy tone.  I will accept that some people want to ask a kazillion questions, and that it is not because they want to control and know every little thing I do, but because they care about me and just want to talk.  I am going to try and learn to use small talk more often.  This is not going to be easy, but I pray that it will benefit me in the long run.

I am going to stop trying to make everything fit into my schedule.  I will accept that I am out of town during MckMama's photoshoot in the big D and I will not stress that it would be my only chance to meet her in person or have her take photos of my little one. 

We shall see how this goes...